Pink Crackberries Rock..

Just got a new toy today..the pink Curve Blackberry. Girlie and powerful at the same time...as my husband says "perfect for you honey".

Feel like I am on the verge of so many new things lately. September is such a month of new beginnings and I am itchy. Ready to break through the wall with Tony, my workouts and my body and it has me just excited and scared at the same time. Kicking ass and taking names with my volunteer work with 3 different non-profits that were in desperate need of leadership - feels SO good to be useful again and to just have purpose beyond my family. Really debating going back to business school for once and for all while I am not working and before Lana starts school in a few years..for now working for free will need to be enough.

I feel like so much of this comes from feeling confident about my body and self again. Day by day I feel my old confidence coming back which means those who are insecure in areas of my life start getting "threatened". Oh well. My tolerance for ignorance and insecurity by peers is zero these days. We are in our late 30's people, let's find yourself and stop comparing so much to others and feeling "less than". I am done with passive agressive crap from "friends" and have told them that outright. You are on my team or you are not. I give so much to myself to those in my life, I have no time for bullshit. Take me or leave me. Love me or hate me. But don't sit on the fence - I don't do grey in friendships.

Rock on,
Paula

Yin and Yang really need each other..

That about sums about my weekend..was unbelieveable. UN-BE-LIEVABLE. Meeting my friend's wife who has been battling brain cancer for 5 years was a life changing experience. She is my new freakin' hero and inspiration for ANYTHING that I don't feel like I have the energy or guts to do going forward. Just a total rockstar..love her.

And because I know you want to know...things were perfect with my friend and I. We got to have so many talks and spend so much gorgeous alone time together. I love him so much in just a special way. So many people assumed we were married this weekend and every time we both would yell out "NO - we would kill each other!" at the same time. And it is so true. So important to find a Yin to your Yang. And we are both..well...Yang. We had a long talk about our spouses this weekend and it was really funny for us to figure out that our partners have almost identical personalities - which is what makes them perfect for us!

Amazing weekend. Thank you God for bringing such special people in my life - I am blessed.
Rock on,
Paula

So..well...yeah.

So I've been avoiding writing about this topic because well, I don't know why. But what the hell.

This weekend I am going to Chicago. To run a race. To help in a race for a friend's foundation for brain cancer research. She is an amazing person and I am thrilled to even be associated with her.

The little part you don't know: I am going with one of my oldest and best friends on the planet and that doesn't even do it justice. We are flying in at the same time tonight, leaving on the same time on Monday. We'll be sleeping on couches, floors and lord knows where else. But we haven't been away alone together since, well, Mardi Gras in 1997. We've been friends since I was 18 and have probably talked almost every day since then. No lie. But we have not lived in the same state past college.

Did I mention that HE and I dated for 7 years and almost got married? Did I say that yet? No, probably not.

At this point we have been friends for almost 20 years and for the past 13 have only been friends. He is married with 3 kids now (2 adopted, one step). He has been with his wife for 10 years. I was maid of honor in his wedding. I have gone on vacation with them. Me going with him this weekend (it is friend's wife who has the foundation) was his WIFE'S idea. To be honest, we both thought that was a little weird and funny - even after all this time. I am married with 2 kids and my husband is a total rockstar. He also has no problem with this. Which is amazing and weird and fabulous that he is so secure.

But there is a part of me that is nervous and excited. Because underneath all the friendship...well, is something more that will always exist for both of us. We joke that when we are 90 and our spouses have kicked the bucket, we'll end up getting married at a nursing home.

We both realized many years ago that as much as we love each other, we could never be together. We are two peas in a pod and anytime we tried getting too serious, it just didn't work. We work as friends. So I have this part of my life that has my husband and my kids and then I have him. And he has the same. Does anyone find that odd? The odd part for me is that I don't. It is like having a soulmate in a friend that just happens to be of the opposite sex and well, isn't your husband and never could be.

Well, until we're 90.

Rock on,
Paula

Pictures and Cereal and All the Good Stuff!

So...3 month mark with the T man..yikes! What a journey so far and I feel like I have just started!! Can't wait to see what happens at say, a year? I have a new set of menus (cereal! Yams! rice! bread! berries!) , a whole new type of workout (anyone else doing 30/40/50/60 reps AFTER each exercise..yipe yipe yipe) and well..let's see what happens here...MAYBE you'll see this rockstar up on stage late next year?? MAYBE....never say never! And make sure you zoom on the bikini - I was SO EXCITED TO FIND IT!!

And less you forget (because I sure would like to!!)..this is where I was 3 months ago..

The most fascinating thing so far is that I have only lost about 8 or so inches, have dropped now about 15 pounds but I feel like my body is taking on a whole new shape...I LOVE TONY!! I LOVE TONY!!

Rock on everyone, rock on,

Paula

Pan Mass Challenge 2008!

Make a Smilebox slideshow